Part 1
As an African-American young woman, I do not necessarily follow any way of life or have yet to partake in a sacred cultural ritual of tradition. I do believe that Americans should create or celebrate more transition-based rituals to acknowledge and prepare people for the next stage of their life. A few rituals that should be celebrated in America are the first menses of a young woman, getting married, and becoming pregnant.
A woman receiving her first period should be celebrated in American culture instead of hidden. As mentioned in the lecture from this week, woman are indirectly told to cover up their period and not everybody should know when it is your “time of the month”. Men also tend to harass women about it, as they blame us for being emotional and in pain for “it being the time of the month”. It seems that people are embarrassed about a cycle that nobody can control rather than embracing it and that stems from western media.
Getting married is not a tradition in America, but the way people celebrate is different due to thousands of cultures and traditions that have been brought to America. I believe in the African-American culture, marriage is definitely something that most people would love to accomplish and celebrate, but finding a partner is difficult for some people and marriage can sometimes have a negative association. I believe that people don’t value marriage and love as much as they used to anymore, so marriage has become less of a reality for most people in my community.
Becoming pregnant is a huge accomplishment. Many women are not able to conceive, so when women become pregnant, they become very excited, at least in most cases. Teenage pregnancy is one of those cases where it is not celebrated as much, and I believe that you’re able to do whatever you want with your body but being able to conceive is an accomplishment.
Part 2
I have only been through one of the three rituals that I mentioned, which was getting my first period. I was 10 years old and very afraid of getting my period as I did not know what was going on with my body. My first thought was that something was very wrong and I needed medical attention as soon as possible. This happened on the first day of 5th grade for me. My mom had educated me about my period, but not having it before and seeing blood automatically made me think something was wrong. My mother’s reaction to me getting my first period sort of set the tone to how I react to my cycle still to this day, which is basically not acknowledging it to anyone else unless I needed to. Even in American television shows that revolve around a girl getting her period, she’d be in school and whispering to another girl to ask for a sanitary pad and a change of pants and they would make it seems as it’s embarrassing when it’s honestly not. It’s a way of life and it’s human nature, so it is out of our control so the last thing we should be taught is to be embarrassed about it. To be embarrassed about your cycle is to basically be embarrassed of yourself. Looking back on my first cycle, I do not regret being secretive about it, but I do regret allowing TV shows to make me feel less of myself. To avoid this feeling in girls, I believe that instead of pushing ads to make us feel embarrassed, that we should encourage public discussions of periods and to allow us to be ourselves when we’re on our periods.
Part 3
As a college student, I do not feel as if I do not belong to a community, but there are times where I feel that I do not belong in college at all. I see people who got the hang of being alone rather quickly, compared to myself where I still struggle to accomplish certain tasks on time while not being reminded to do so, struggling to keep myself together for classes, and even struggling to maintain friends. This goes into what I believe about implicit and explicit messages about how genders should behave in college. Women in college are implicitly taught to keep themselves together, no matter what we go through personally. We are also explicitly told to not have sex, to stay focused on our studies, and to not party. It’s almost like the girls are told we are only at school to get a degree and to not have fun like our male counterparts. As for males, I believe that they are implicitly told to sleep with as many girls as they can, get drunk every weekend, and to do whatever they can while they have no responsibility.
Hi Reagan, thank you for sharing your thoughts with us this week. I give you a lot of credit for being brave enough to talk about a time in your life that may have felt embarrassing, uncomfortable, and scary. Instead of being a ritual of transition that is joyous and a cause for celebration, many approach this stage with mortifying dread. The taboo that surrounds menstruation and talking about one’s cycle is so deeply ingrained in us (both locally and globally) that it is definitely worth taking a moment to break down and examine… just why are we so unwilling to discuss this natural bodily process? Is it because it’s gross, or a form of ‘pollution’? Is it because we as females have ‘penis envy’? Many academics have theorized and searched for answers, yet here we still are in 2019, sitting terrified in a public restroom and hoping that no one will hear us tear our pad/tampon package open. In addition to changing how we as women view our bodies (which is a HUGE step), I think that us overcoming our unwillingness to talk about periods might bring on some other positive changes, such as the elimination of sales tax on tampons. Perhaps a world-wide discussion about the normalcy of shedding the lining of one’s uterus will make people begin to accept menstrual hygiene products as a medical necessity (as opposed to a cosmetic/luxury item); in this way, we could advocate for lower costs for these products, which would allow those from low-income backgrounds to have better access to the items that they need to manage their bodies on their own terms. I believe there is a lot of power in that agency. Great post!
Hey Reagan, I loved this post. I agree when you said that marriage is not a tradition in the USA. Marriage used to be an act of love but in today times its more of a socially expected event, meaning that everyone is expected to get marry after dating for a certain period of time. In today society, were it hard to find a partner, people rush the concept of marring because their “clock is running out of time”.
Yes, we should be more open about periods. I do not think in a way of “oh hey guys I have my period!!” because the concept of blood is disturbing for some. But we should be mature enough to discussed period. For example, women period are a natural monthly cycle that occurs within a women’s body and we should not be charged tax’s fees. We should also not be charging women prisoners to access to pad/tampons.
I agree that the implicated message that women are taught to keep themselves together. Like I walk in the bathroom at the bars and half of the girls in the bathroom are not there to use the bathroom, but to look themselves in the mirror to make sure they look good and not messy, making sure we are well put together.